The Mom Crowd

How well do you like your Pediatrician? Occasionally I get asked by my friends who my Pediatrician is and how well I like her. When I needed to choose one I read a ton of  articles online about what to look for and asked my friends for referrals. We also interviewed our doctor to make sure that we had the same theories on health care and our personalities fit.

Here are a few practical tips about choosing a Pediatrician:

Consider the location of the office. How far do you want to drive for well baby check ups? Do you want to drive farther if you really love one doctor?

Interview prospective Pediatricians and have your questions ready. They usually have designated office hours to be interviewed. It can really save you a lot of heartache to meet them in person before they show up in your hospital room. Also, you will be able to check out the office before you bring your baby. Is it clean? Are the well children separated from the sick children?

Make sure that they service the hospital you are birthing at. Not all pediatricians have access to every hospital in town.

Do they really match your health care philosophy? For example, how well do they encourage breastfeeding if you want to breastfeed? They may say that they encourage breastfeeding, but what is their philosophy on supplementing? Especially during the time while you are waiting for your milk to come in. Most doctors won’t say that they prescribe a lot of medicine. I think you have to tell their philosophy about meds by the way they speak about prescriptions.

Find out how long the nurse has assisted the doctor. I think you can tell a lot about a doctor by how well they get along with their co-workers. My doctor’s nurse has been with her for over 18 years. That seemed like a good sign to me.  Also, there may be no way of knowing, but having a competent nurse comes in very handy. Many times she has solved my problem over the phone without coming in for a visit.

Ask for referrals from your friends. This is by far the best source of information in finding a Pediatrician. I asked everyone I knew and interviewed one based on the information I received. Moms can tell you first hand if they are pleased with their doctor’s office.

Does the Pediatrician’s office have weekend hours? I have went in on a Saturday once and I was very thankful that I didn’t have to wait three more days with my super sick baby to find out what is wrong.

Find another doctor if you don’t feel comfortable with your own. At your first visit you don’t sign a contract agreeing to only use them as your doctor for the next five years. If you don’t like the care you are getting or the way they communicate information to you, then you have freedom to find another one you like.

Pray and trust your Mom Instincts. Sometimes you have several choices and they all seem like good options. I would go with your instinct and go with the doctor you have peace about. That is how I ultimately chose mine and I have been happy with my decision.

Do you have any tips for new moms looking for a Pediatrician? Do you like your doctor? Why do you like them? Have you had any problems with your Pediatrician?

More Information:

Shopping for a Pediatrician on WebMD

Choosing a Doctor for Your Baby on Baby Center

Choosing a Pediatrician on Expectatant Mother’s Guide

10 Questions to Ask When Choosing a Pediatrician on iVillage

Choosing a Pediatrician on Ask Dr. Sears

If you are mom and a blogger then you should definitely take a peak into the clubhouse of the Mom Blogger’s Club (MBC) and go on in. I have been a member for over three months and it is a great place to ask questions and meet other bloggers. The Mom Blogger’s Club is the social network arm of The Mom Salon and is founded by Jennifer James. I have had a little bit of personal correspondence with Jennifer, read her blog posts and her participation in the club and found that she is one of the most encouraging and unpretentious bloggers I have ever met.

The Mom Blogger’s Club allows you to have your own profile page where other moms can leave you comments and you can share news and post pictures and add friends. In the “We’re Talkin’” section there are general questions that are open to anyone to answer. You can also join groups or start your own group based on your specific interests.

The members in this community are very active. If you ask a question, you will almost get an answer within a day. Also, you will get quality answers. Some questions are asked within a group and you have to be a member of that group to answer the question. All you need to do is click “join this group” unless the group is closed. The questions are about everything blogging like who designed your blog, what turns you off on a blog, and what your husband or significant other thinks about your blogging. There is also a section about Motherhood, Parenting, & Family.

The design of MBC is incredibly easy to navigate. Their front page has a lot of information without seeming to be cluttered. I found it simple to set up my account and to start meeting other people.

In some networks I have felt shy about sending friend requests and “adding friends,” but I don’t find that here. Most people are willing to help you and be your friend. It is up to each of us how much we want to network and connect with each other. Even if you don’t ask questions or add friends you will still learn a lot about blogging from the discussions.

Note: You must use the “www.” when typing in their url (www.mombloggersclub.com) or you won’t be able to get to the site.

Are you a member of Mom Blogger’s Club? How do you like it? Are you active? Are you sick of joining every social network under the sun?

I hope everyone had a great weekend! We did a theme night Saturday night and stuffed our faces with Indian food and watched ‘The Namesake.’

Just wanted to let you know that if everything goes according to plan the next episode of The Mom Crowd Show! will be out next Monday. McKenna was away this week at the National Down Syndrome Conference. Also, McKenna and I are running a 5K this weekend and will be filming the show at the finish line.

Finally, be sure to check out our new Promo Code page. There are some fabulous discounts from Moon and Back Studios, Shop at Baby Cakes, and Bugalug Baby!

I am a big fan of Friends. One of the things that the writers of this classic sitcom did so well, in my opinion, was make Monica’s relationship with her mother into a problem that a lot of us face: hopelessly trying to please a critical parent. Because it was tv, Friends was able to milk a lot of jokes from this relationship that at times appeared a little exaggerated (there were a couple of hilarious jokes over the years where Judy Geller seemed to even forget she had a daughter!) For some of us, sometimes those situations resonated all too easily.

I thought it’d be fun to learn from Monica and her mother’s experiences, so I present to you my

Five Easy Steps To Avoid Becoming Monica’s Mom

1. Compliment your child on their efforts, even if you’d rather nitpick. In “The One With the Sonogram at the End”, Jack and Judy come over for dinner with Monica & Ross, and Mom is quick to judge that the spaghetti Monica is serving is “easy“, making it clear that she’s disappointed while pointedly fluffing Monica’s couch pillows. We all know how it feels to be Monica here: frantic that guests are coming over (especially her hyper-critical mom) and working hard to make everything as nice as possible. Mrs. Geller should have said, “Thank you for having us. Spaghetti’s great. I’m just glad to spend time with you.” Children will never get tired of hearing how much they and their efforts are valued in their parents’ eyes.

2. Love each child in your family equally. It was a running gag in the world of Friends that Mr. & Mrs. Geller favored Ross over Monica. Some classic bits: “I just wish Nana was here to hear Ross’s toast” – right after Monica gave her horribly inappropriate one at the Gellers’ anniversary party, and “We turned Monica’s room into a gym.” Let’s not forget that all of Monica’s childhood mementos were ruined in the Gellers’ garage when they used her boxes to stop a flood. Of course, this is pure comedy, but when parents show favoritism, even in the subtlest of ways, children notice. It’s more than making sure each kid has an equal amount of ice cream; we need to invest equal amounts of energy in each of our children’s varying interests. (If you happen to have made this mistake already in the lives of your kids, just follow Jack’s lead and give the less-favored child your Porsche. It seemed to make all of Monica’s issues disappear!  )

3. Understand that these kinds of negative traits are passed on from generation to generation. In “The One Where Nana Dies Twice”, Judy confided to Monica that she was frustrated by her own mother’s critical nature. Of course, she remained oblivious to her constant harping on Monica. How many times have we heard her drop a comment that Monica’s hairstyle is unflattering, or that her singleness was a terrible thing? The good news is, the pattern of passing down these traits can be stopped! All it takes is some self-awareness and a desire to change, along with a lot of hard work.

I know this from personal experience. As a minor example, last fall, I realized that I was a little obsessive about my daughter Lucy’s hair when we went to public places. If I was unable to fix it in any cute way, I’d make some comment to other people like, “Look at her crazy hair.” As though her toddler hairstyle was a reflection on my parenting skills or something, and as though Lucy had any control over it. When I caught myself doing that, I realized I was emphasizing her appearance more than her value as a person, and I made a point to stop worrying about it. I mean, who cares? Now, her hair looks precious all the time and no one says anything about that either.

4. Don’t spend your daughter’s wedding fund on a beach house! Especially if she knows about it and she’s counting on it. ‘Nuff said.

5. Never, under any circumstances, bring up old embarrassing stories in front of your adult childrens’ friends. This one applies to Ross. In “The One With the Cake”, the Gellers bring to everyone’s attention something that Ross did as a toddler. It’s so completely mortifying that I am choosing not to repeat it here. Ross, however, handles it like a pro. After all, he’s the one who still refers to Judy as “Mommy” in public, so I don’t think he embarrasses all that easily.

To be fair, I love the character of Judy Geller. Here are a couple of things about her that I find endearing:

• She’s very affectionate, supportive, and frisky with her husband. Of course, this can sometimes seem kinda disgusting, since we see them from Ross & Monica’s point of view. But it’s sweet all the same. I mean, 35 years together! They’re adorable.
• She’s totally blunt and hilariously scathing when she speaks to people. One of my favorite episodes is “The One Where Ross Gets High” (aka “The Thanksgiving When Rachel Screwed Up the Trifle”). The Gellers are there to experience Rachel’s botched cooking experiment, as well as witness a fantastic blowout between Monica and Ross. Judy gets to deliver my favorite monologue from the show: “That’s a lot of information to get in 30 seconds… Joey, if you wanna leave, just leave. Rachel, no you weren’t supposed to put beef in the trifle. It. Did. Not. Taste. Good. Phoebe, I’m sorry, but I think Jacques Cousteau is dead. Monica, why you felt you had to hide the fact that you’re in an important relationship is beyond me. Ross, drugs? Divorced, again? Chandler, you’ve been Ross’s best friend all these years, stuck by him during the drug problems, and now you’ve taken on Monica as well. Well, I don’t know what to say. You’re a wonderful human being.” Her delivery is awesome.

What fun memories do you have from Friends? Did you ever find yourself relating to Monica’s relationship with her mother?  Have you heard the news that “our little Har-Monica” is going to be on three episodes of Scrubs in the fall?

Do you ever feel like your house is actually a plastic factory because of all the plastic toys, sippie cups, and utensils you have for your kids? I do. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed at all the plastic that has invaded every room in my house. Especially when I read things that remind me that every piece of plastic ever invented is still on the earth and hasn’t decomposed. Or that animals are dying because plastic toys, bags and other products end up in the oceans, rivers, lakes, forests and animals eat them. Or when I read about how there are harmful plastics in plastic forks, cups, plates, spoons that my kids use everyday. I know that I don’t want to contribute to further global damage any more than I have to but it is truly impossible to avoid ALL plastics. Even though I aspire to reduce, reuse, recycle everything, I know that I will not be able to do that. My kids see things that interest them and 90% of the time they are made of plastic. I could simply institute a rule where we only buy used toys (nothing wrong with that) or wooden toys. Again, an unlikely solution. If I knew what I know now when I first started having kids, I would have stuck closer to cloth and wooden toys. I have already replaced or discarded several plastic eating items–they are much easier to replace.

I have begun to think more about the toys I get for my kids and to be a little more choosy when purchasing something new. I can’t control what grandparents get for the kids but I have encouraged them to think a little more green when it comes to toy buying.

There are lots of options for non-plastic toys and dinnerware so I thought I’d pass them along in case you have one of those moments where you contemplate throwing away every small piece of plastic that you have stepped on one too many times and need some replacement items. Or maybe you are tired of replacing batteries or hearing that obnoxious toy song for the umteenth time.

A word about wooden toys: one thing that attracts me to wooden toys is that they tend to open the mind for more creation and imaginative play. Instead of having plastic superheroes and movie characters that have already been created for you, wooden toys are more generic so that the imagination can take over. They also are more geared for educational learning. Wooden toys are not only durable but they have a “classic” look to them and are easier to pass on to the next generation.

Even though I could probably open my own store full of plastic toys, (we have a whole plastic bin full of “characters” that the boys play with all the time!) I keep my eye on earth friendly, natural, fun toys too. I don’t mean to communicate that all plastic superheroes, barbies, or Polly Pockets are evil–it is just nice to know that there are other options out there than the mainstream toys we are bombarded with everyday.

Toys:

RosieHippo Toys

Oompa Toys

Melissa and Doug

Water bottles, plates, spoons etc:

Kleen Kanteen

Bamboo Baby Fork and Spoon

The Snack Sack (a portable cloth sack that includes a stainless steel bowl–used instead of a ziplock bag)

Stainless Steel bowls, plates, cups from Lifewithoutplastic.com

More bottles, cups, spoons at thesoftlanding.com