The Mom Crowd

Both my children suck their thumb or other fingers. My 2 year old daughter, Annabelle, sucks her 2 left fingers upside down while her right hand holds her ear. My son, Roman, is only 4 months and he sucks his left thumb. Occasionally he will also hold his ear while sucking his thumb. I suspect this is because he is trying to copy his big sister. While finger sucking can be a problem in later years, I am thankful that they have found a way to comfort themselves.

A lot of my friends who have children that suck their fingers also breastfed their babies. I asked my pediatrician if she noticed that it was more common in breastfed babies and she said no. So what form you choose to feed your baby doesn’t determine if they will find comfort in their fingers or a pacifier.

Don’t Worry

When Annabelle first started to suck her fingers I got really worried and looked up the topic in my What to Expect the First Year book. The book said it wasn’t a big deal and that it shouldn’t affect her teeth, so I stopped worrying about it.  This article on Baby Center also says not to worry about it.

Of course there are many pros and cons to thumb/finger sucking. I don’t have to keep track of a pacifier or put it back in when it falls out while sleeping. My child can soothe themselves whenever and wherever they need it. I do have to wash my daughter’s hands often, so she isn’t sucking on dirty fingers. I also try not to use hand sanitizer, because I don’t want her to be sucking alcohol off her hands. When she was smaller I used to encourage her to suck her fingers when she was upset or about to fall asleep. However, you can’t force them to find comfort in their fingers if they don’t want to.

So when should I be concerned about my children sucking their fingers?

The American Dental Association says:

“Most children stop sucking their thumbs or other fingers on their own between the ages of 2 and 4 years. The behaviour lessens gradually during this period, as children spnd more of their waking hours exploring their surroundings…If a child does not stop on his or her own, parents should discourage the habit after age 4 years.”

I can already tell that my daughter is sucking her fingers less and less. It usually only when she is watching television or going to sleep. I am hoping that it will end on its own. Even Dr. Greene thinks it can end on its own.  I want to tackle potty training, before I take on another problem.

How do I help my child stop sucking their thumb?

eHow.com has 6 different articles on how to teach your kid to stop sucking their thumb. There are a variety of tactics and tools you can use such as: explaining how it damages teeth, using bad tasting substances, thumb guards, distractions, band aids, and sticker charts. My old pediatrician said that instead of pointing it out that you have to praise them when they don’t suck their fingers.  As with any parenting decision you have to find the one that works for you and your child. Just remember that breaking a habit can take a while, so be patient!

I don’t think my 2 year old even knows what she is doing when she does it, so I can’t start the process to stop her yet. I am not ready to tackle problem either, so for now I am letting her enjoy the comfort of her two fingers.

Have you helped your child stop sucking their fingers? If so, how? Are you concerned about your child’s finger sucking?

Last Friday, my 18 month old daughter had her cleft palate repaired and we stayed two nights in the hospital.  Due to various medical issues with my children, I’ve spent my share of nights sleeping on pull-out hospital beds and have learned that staying in the hospital is probably one of the most uncomfortable places to stay.  I have written an article to help parents prepare for their child’s surgery and now have decided that parents also need some encouragement on finding ways to be more comfortable during their hospital stay with their child.  Simple things, like knowing how to silence the iv machine alarm can really make a big difference during your child’s stay.  I’ve also stopped being afraid of bothering the nurses when my child or I need something.

Here are 10 ways to make your hospital stay a little more comfortable:

1. Go home to shower and get a couple hour nap or break if possible.  Allow a friend or family member to stay with your child while they are resting while you go home and recuperate a little.
2. Learn how to silence the alarms on those machines.  Once you’ve paged your nurse that their iv pole bag is empty, there is no need for you to endure the loud, annoying beeping that accompanies the empty iv pole bag.
3. Bring a portable DVD player with headphones and rent a good chick flick.
4. Don’t be afraid to ask your nurse for things you need (like a rocker, extra pillows, to start the coffee maker in the family kitchen, etc…) and more importantly, keep asking until you get it!
5. If you think your child needs pain medicine, then communicate that to your nurse.  I have felt at times like I sounded like I was overly drug-seeking for pain medicine for my child, but staying ahead of the pain after surgery can be the difference of being slightly uncomfortable and completely miserable during your hospital stay.  If the pain medicine is not working, ask your nurse to page your doctor to see if there is something else you can try.
6. Make friends with your child’s roommate.  Conversations with other parents can really help the time to go by quicker.
7. If you’re not happy with your nurse, ask to speak to the charge nurse to share your concerns.
8. On the flip side, make sure you let the charge nurse know when you have a fantastic nurse!  We had the best nurses we’ve ever had this past weekend and was sure to let the charge nurse know what fantastic nurses we had this weekend and named them to her.
9. Don’t feel the need to get up when the nurse comes in your room in the middle of the night to check vital signs or mess with the iv pole.  If your child does not need you to tend to her, keep getting as much sleep as you can!
10. Ask questions about the care your child is receiving.  Learn the dosages of your child’s medication and/or special precautions that should be taken with your child while recovering in the hospital. We have had a couple of incidences with improper dosages and medications with our children which were caught because I was aware of their medication.

What are some ways you have become more comfortable during your child’s hospital stay?

For me, one really fun thing about having a daughter is fixing her hair in cute ways.    By the time her second birthday arrived, it was finally long enough for some styling action.  Here are some of my favorite hairstyles:

1. 

Classic pigtails.  They’re much longer now. 

2. 

The “Jo from The Facts of Life” ponytail.

3. 

Pigtail braids.

4. 

What Lucy and I have dubbed “The Boingies”.  (They go “boing boing”.)  These are pigtails that are pulled through almost all the way and turned into little poofs.

5. 

Leaving it down.  This is Lucy’s favorite.  She always asks if it’s too hot outside.  If it’s not, she asks to leave her hair down.

What are your favorite ways to fix your little girl’s hair?

Ok, so I’ll admit it… I use disposable diapers and I love the ease and convenience of them.  I always thought that I would only use the most expensive name brand diapers because “my children deserve only the best”.  My friends will all attest to the fact that I was a sold-out Pampers snob with our first child.  So often they commented on it that it’s now just kind of a running joke, especially since I only buy generic diapers for our second child.  Oh the things I have learned in my four years of motherhood!

With two kids in diapers, we quickly realized that it was not financially feasable (or smart) for us to spend $150 a month on diapers.  Before I would even consider buying generic diapers, I did my research by polling my friends and of course online searches.  But honestly, the best research I did was actual trials on my own baby.  Here is what I found:

Pampers Swaddlers/Cruisers

Pros: soft outer cover, form fitting, held overnight well, cute designs, available everywhere, coupons readily available, Pampers Gifts to Grow program, goes up to size 7

Cons: most expensive disposable per unit

Pampers Baby Dry

Pros: held overnight well, few leaks, cute designs, available everywhere, coupons readily available, Pampers Gifts to Grow program

Cons: not very form fitting, not stretchy (somewhat restrictive), almost as expensive as Pampers Swaddlers/Cruisers

Huggies

Pros: soft outer cover, stretchy tabs, held overnight well, cute designs, available everywhere, coupons readily available, Huggies Enjoy the Ride program

Cons: not very form fitting, had many poopy leaks (especially in the first few weeks of life while breastfeeding), about the same price as Pampers

Luvs

Pros: soft outer cover, moderate absorption, cute designs, available everywhere, cheaper than Pampers and Huggies

Cons: not very form fitting, somewhat restrictive, needed larger size because of lack of stretch

Parents Choice (Wal-Mart brand)

Pros: soft outer cover, held overnight well, never had a leak, less than $15 a box for 80-100 diapers (sizes vary)

Cons: only at Wal-Mart, harder to detect fullness from outside “feel”

Up and Up (Target brand)

Pros: soft outer cover (similar to Pampers), held overnight well, form fitting, cute design, about $15 a box for 80-100 diapers (sizes vary)

Cons: only at Target, seems to get full faster than other brands, harder to detect fullness from outside “feel”

Overall, we have been really happy using the Parents Choice and Up and Up diapers.  Admittedly, we kept our son in Pampers longer than we would have liked because he was difficult to potty train and Pampers went up to a size 7, but just changing one kid to store brand diapers saved us over $50 a month! 

What has your experience with store brand/generic disposable diapers been?  How many brands of diapers did you try before deciding on the right one for your child?

Photo Courtesy of: Kimblahg

What do you do if your child comes to you and wants _____ that you think are too expensive?

In our case that is shoes.  Our 5 year old saw a commercial for a brand of shoes and was convinced that the shoes would help him run faster.  He has recently grown out of his old shoes and does need new ones.  When I looked up how much the shoes he wants are I thought, “No way am I paying for those!”  At first I wanted to tell him that we were not getting those shoes because they are too expensive.  I knew that answer wouldn’t really make a lot of sense to him and would probably make him angry.   My husband reminded me that it could be a good life lesson and that we should think about approaching it from a different angle.

My husband asked me how much I would normally spend on shoes for the boys.  I told him and we came up with a strategy to help the 5 year old learn about managing money.  We also wanted to guide him and help him make a decision that he could be happy with.

We looked online with the 5 year old at the shoes he wants.  We did tell him that the shoes cost more than we want to spend on the shoes but that he did have some options. We told him that we would pay for a certain amount of the shoes and that he would have to come up with the rest of the money. We asked him if he would like to know what other kids do when they want something that costs more than they have.  He said, “Sure!”

We said that some kids:

• save up their birthday money and use it to buy something they want
• ask their parents, grandparents, neighbors if they have extra jobs they can pay him for
• choose to buy something less expensive that is within their budget
• wait for it to go on sale

He thought about it and he either wants to save some of his birthday money or do extra jobs to make up the difference.  As soon as he can pay up then we will happily take him out shopping.  We feel good that he is learning about how to live within a budget and work hard for the extra things he wants.  We shared that we have to make those same decisions when we want to buy things that are cost more than we have in our budget.  We feel like it is a real world learning opportunity for him–he’ll have to make lots of similar decisions about money as he grows up.

We look forward to using this strategy more as these situations come up more often in the future. I think he’ll feel good about participating in buying something that he wants.  If he figures out that those shoes won’t actually make him run faster then he’ll also learn another good life lesson.

How do you handle it when your kids want something that you think is too expensive?  What do you tell your kids?

**photo courtesy of   flickr’s plasticrevolver